Today is no ordinary Friday—it’s World Party Day! If you weren’t already planning on raging tonight, rethink your plans. Get up and off of the couch because why would you even consider missing out on this massive global human boozing-festivity? Regardless of how you celebrate, chances are you’ll be hungover come Saturday morning. That’s why we’ve compiled several traditional hangover “remedies” from all over the map. Some methods may help, others may not, either way, you’ll be amused to see how other countries claim to dismiss the spins:
Ancient Rome: After a crazy night at the bathhouses, Pliny the Elder declared that by devouring a “deep-fried canary” (yes, we mean the bird), a hangover would diminish in an instant.
Namibia: Namibians are fond of indulging in “Buffalo Milk” to cure their hangovers, but this concoction actually contains everything but milk from a buffalo. It’s really a mixture of clotted (cow) cream, dark and spiced rum, cream liqueur and whole cream. Sounds exactly how they might’ve gotten a hangover in the first place…
Puerto Rico: In order to prevent a hangover, Puerto Ricans claim that rubbing a slice of lemon (or lime) in the armpit of their drinking arm will do the trick. Either someone’s drinking buddy had terrible body odor or this method really works, we just have one question—what happens if you double-fist?
Japan: When your head’s spinning in Japan, the traditional technique to banish any bad feelings is to eat umeboshi, which is a strongly pickled, dried ume (similar to a plum or apricot). Sometimes they even mix the fruit in green tea to make it less sour.
Haiti: Haitians get really serious when it comes to their hangovers. Some voodoo practitioners claim that sticking 13 black-headed pins into the cork of the bottle that caused your hangover will mystically make you feel less sick. But how do you punish a flask?
Ancient Greece: Alcohol getting revenge on you in ancient Greece? Not a problem. Just eat a traditional hearty breakfast of sheep lungs and two owl eggs and you’ll be good to go. That is, if you don’t develop a massive stomachache first.
Ireland: According to legend, the best way to cure a hangover is to be buried neck deep in wet river sand. Being located so far north, Ireland’s weather is far from warm, so this technique is essentially the same as taking a cold shower (which sounds like the opposite of comforting).
Mongolia: After a long night of boozing, Mongolians like to treat themselves to a cup of tomato juice and…two pickled sheep’s eyes (that’s right, we said eyes). We don’t know about you, but that sounds more nauseating than any hangover could make us. We think we’ll just stick to a good ol’ fashioned Bloody Mary and call it a day.